Monday, May 26, 2008


Wassup people? So first and foremost, happy Memorial day. I'm currently in the CT, gun wavin' New Haven to be exact and the old adage still stands: the more things change, the more they stay the same. For those who are close to me, this trip was necessary due to the past year being very trying in many aspects, both professionally and personally. I've always had the tendency to get out and hit that open road when the odds seem to mount up and the brain needs to be cleared. Nothing gives you enough time to sort things upstairs as with twelve hours of driving. It's been a wonderful trip, I've been able to view some of God's beautiful creation and really come to terms with things that have happened in the past and get the lesson from each circumstance.

One major thing I've realized came to its fullness from just being here in CT. So many times we've all looked back and questioned if what we had before was what we needed and have even gone back to it. It's so necessary to trust your heart in those circumstances when there is something telling you to move on. Many times this looking back while having the hands set to the plow stems from the fear of the future. We fear if what we have now is our last chance at love, success, or peace of mind. I have a mantra that I've learned over the years that goes like this: This won't be the last time I'm _____________. Fill in the blank: in love, happy, safe, secure, peaceful, successful. If any of those situations were present before and gone at the moment, it is no indication that it won't be there again. So have hope, trust that God is bringing more good things down the road, it's in His nature to bless.

Two blessings that has helped me realize this truth were my lovely goddaughter and the news that my brother from another mother and his wife are expecting their first, also a girl. I realized that life goes on and those around me are blessed with brand new seeds and one day that will be me. Everyday is a gift that there are hidden treasures throughout the day that we so often miss. There's those flashes that I've had on some days on this trip that I stepped out of myself and looked in and said, " This moment is monumental in the simplicity of the happiness felt right now," and it's almost as if I could take the moment before and after that and connect them and just loop them over and over, I would have in an instant. Pain is always going to be there in our lives but I wouldn't do without it because it's helped me seek those moments of pleasure in the slightest occurrence.

The trip is almost over and I'll be back home to enjoy the comforts of home. I've developed a sense of refuge the past month when I've thought of my place. It's my abode, my spot, that hasn't been there really all year since I complained of Greenville, but I can honestly say that even though it hasn't gotten better, I can appreciate what I know and what it is to me.

On the music front, I'm anxious to check the new Usher and Al Green. I DL'ed the new Roots and love it, I was very glad to see them with a video on 106 and Park (purely by accident did I see that, I can't do BET much at all these days, except my Different World at night) and checked a few songs on the new Lyfe. I'm feelin' Never Never Land, 30 ain't the new 20, it's the same ol' 30 and that's so true but a topic for another day.

Peace and hair grease to all and I'll hit you lata.....

Sunday, May 18, 2008

2nd day on the road

What is up, subscribers?? I'm sitting right now in a Panera in Indianapolis waiting for my computer to charge. I got on the road yesterday morning from the folks place in VA and drove into Kentucky and camped out underneath the stars up in the Appalachians. It was beautiful, but in a melancholy sort of way. You're surrounded by beauty and the first thing you think is it would be nice to share this someone outside of a 3x5. I'm hoping one day I'll be able to describe all that took place one day to my grandkids. Since then, I got on this morning on the road through KY to here in IN. Where I'm staying is however my fancy is tickled.

One thing I've noticed while being on the road, your thoughts are all over the place pondering everything from what heaven is like to can the Celtics win a championship without winning any road games and winning all home games? Deep questions, I know. A few things came to my attention though that definitely deserve attention.

1) The rumor is that Lauryn Hill is soon to drop a new LP.....if this is true, expect me to not sleep between the time it is confirmed until it drops. I was just listening to the classic "Nothing even matters" from Miseducation of Lauryn Hill (an album by itself that could make top ten albums of ANY genre) and thinking to match this is impossible for any other but her. The rumor was she's been recording steadily since she dropped off the map. If it is true, oh if it is true. I'll keep all updated, but in the meantime just hit up "Exfactor" and tell me that woman can't capture pain perfectly in her voice and lyrics.

2) I hate vanity plates with a passion. In VA, they are cheap as hell and everyone gets one. I just have a problem with the idea that all that defines me can be explained in 7 or 8 alphanumerics on the back of my car. I don't think I could do it in two pages, much less two words or acronyms. Don't fall suspect to it, you are so much more than a quip, trust me.

3) Driving in the rain is not cool, between the reduced traction, you have the on off sprinkle that causes you to switch up the speed of the windshield wipers until you hear that squeak when it's bone dry (like nails on a chalkboard) and then you have the windows fogging up. I love sunshine....

4) The beauty of being on a trip is twofold: it's the ability to get away from the madness and see other perspectives and yet still get home to feel that "home again" feeling. That's why travel is a the best of both worlds.

I'll write more as the trip goes along. Hope all is well with everyone. Peace and blessings....

Thursday, May 01, 2008

Summertime...and the livin' is easy... fish are jumpin...

Hey people, I have had the hardest time trying to focus on impending finals next week without the idea of hitting the road right after that last packet of equations and problems is handed in. I've had a few ideas for the blog, but nothing concrete or pressing and I've been excited about the idea of hitting the road and seeing the country. I'm taking all back roads if I can help it, no highways, you never see anything.

I've accepted the fact that this is my last real "summer" and is a year late. Last summer was spent scrambling to get my master's thesis finished and defended so so many plans were put on hold. With the advent of research this fall and that being practically a year round endeavor until dissertation defense, graduation and back into the real world again, this is my last "On the road" summer. My last chance to live out all my Jack Kerouac fantasies of being carefree and open to new lessons and new experiences.

I have as of late been contemplating things in my past and have come to the conclusion that for all those who's paths have crossed mine, I'm hoping that I had a positive impact in some way because all of you certainly did it for me and let me get on record, that for all the mistakes and pain I brought to your lives, I hope all is forgiven. I was recently asked if I was in love; I'm in love with the future and future of those in my life and all the good things God has in store for me and them. I'm in love with the present and the wonderful relationships I've maintained. I have an affair with the feeling you get when you see a huge tree blowing in the breeze and the sound of thunder in the distance. I lust for that quiet time with my thoughts when I'm sitting on my balcony as the sun goes down. Yeah, I think I am in love, head over heels, unadulterated....with life.

This is probably my segue into the summer series. I promise to post every time I get service for the next month sharing all the little things that will probably bore you to tears but hopefully capture your imagination as well. Peace be unto y'all.......