thoughts about various subjects including a part for the fellas

Hello folks, as always, hoping this finds you well and blessed. I just got home from going out to Franklin St. For those who are not local, it's the place to be in the area if you live or go to UNC-Chapel Hill. It was a cool night, met an old friend I used to work with and always good to hear about a place you left and realizing you left at the right time. Timing is everything as the saying goes. Another plus tonight was getting hit on. It's been a minute and always feels good, not in an egotistical way, but I guess just realizing someone finds you attractive is gratifying, on some level you feel wanted and desired. We all hope for that in some way, preferably from that special person or soulmate if you will, but since I'm not quite sure of that person, the compliments satisfy a small part of that. It was a good way to end the weekend.

Now, on to what I decided to write about. I seem to focus a lot on the ladies and write to them. However, tonight it's to the fellas out there. This is inspired by a lovely soul who gave me the inspiration. Gentlemen, it's about timing as I said before. How is it that there are men still showing all their cards from the jump? Guys, let's get this established: on a second date, going on a romantic three hour cruise with flowers and all the romantic aspect is overkill. Subtlety is the name of the game, letting her know that she intrigues you, but you're taking time to know her, realize where she's coming from, learning her intricacies, realizing what makes her unique. Before that, there is no way love can come in a true form. Gentlemen, you have to look for the signs of interest, the women of quality are not making it known overtly that they desire to be around you, but covertly, she's dropping signals. Her body language, if she's into you, she's open, inviting, not in a sexual form but in a personal one. She's making a small part of her vulnerable and revealing, "Part of me really wants to be let out in front of you so that you can accept me and build a foundation for a relationship." The way she looks at your eyes, smiles at you, turns her body towards you, the relaxing manner that she gestures with, the way she leans forward to you as you discuss your backgrounds and your likes and dislikes. These are signs of interest. It's a dance in that we have to know the steps and play our part to get past the point of slight awkwardness to get to the heart of each other. It's an amazing process that is rewarding if you do it right and frustrating if you don't. If she's doing the opposite of all these, then there isn't a connection. Don't take it personally, it's a matter of chemistry, some people just work while others don't. It's not rejection, it's slimming down the available prospects. If the magic is there, don't force it. Jewelry in the first six months is too much. Flowers and heart felt expressions is too much in the first month, but do make sure to give small signs of interest. Smiles, listen to her, repeat back what you hear, observe her and get a feel for her, a slight touch of the hand, nothing crazy, just understated makes a world of good. It confirms a connection IF you see the signs on her end.

I'm tired, so I'm gonna wrap this up. Take some tips and enjoy the moment. I'll holla at y'all later. Peace and blessings. One.......